You`re always stubborn!` I heard one girl say to another as I walked past them in a market. I hadn`t even crossed the next shop when a seller shouted at his helper, calling him `Chhotu!` just because he was a little shorter than the others.

These instances, and so many more likethem, are very common occurrences and you`d be surprised how often they happen around you every single day. Maybe you`ve overheard them.

Maybe, unknowingly, you`ve said them: `motu, `motti,` `chuhiya,` or `sissy`, all those half-baked names we, or others, casually throw at someone because of their looks, habits or personality. These names feel like fun to the ones saying them. However, they don`t feel that good to those at the receivingend.

Labels are not our real names or our real traits.

They are just something someone else decided was funny or accurate, or `just the way they see us, even without thinking at all.

Perhaps you could be the one calling your friend, `stickman` because of him being thin; or your younger brother `slowpoke` every time he takes a little longer to get ready. It may sound funny to you but, to them, these names start to feel real like they`re only ever seen as clumsy or uptight, instead of everything else they truly are.

The many faces of labels Labelling isn`t just about calling someone a name. It goes much deeper than that. It`s about reducing someone`s entire personality or experience to a single word or trait.

For example, if your class fellow fails a test just once, suddenly everyone starts whispering, `Yeah, she`s weak in studies.` That one comment, even if said indirectly, might be enough to make her stop raising her hand in class next time, even if she knows the answer. She begins to doubt herself, not because she`s actually weak, but because others have decided that`s what she is.

Some children speak less. Silence is part of their comfort zone, not a flaw. But even close ones, like family or friends, might casually label them `Ajeeb sa hai!`(He`s a bit weird). That single word `ajeeb` will hit hard, making the child feel like their calm nature is something strange or wrong. They begin to see themselves as `different`, even when all they`re doing is according to their nature.

And then there`s the sensitive girl, the one who instantly cries the moment she is being scolded or spoken to harshly. Instead of understanding that some people are very tender inside, her siblings or friends would call her, `Drama queen!` And if she reacts, the default response would be, `Come on, it was just a joke.

But that`s the thing, what might be a moment of fun for one, could feel like a hit to the one on the receiving end. Whether it`s a casual remark about being thin, short, too tall, chubby or dark complexioned, it really hurts.

Once labelled, the acceptance begins Labelling someone based on limited observation is very common. Whether it takes place in schools, workplaces or families, it plays a powerful role inshaping not only how we see others, but also how individuals come to see themselves.

In psychology, the labelling theory suggests that once a person is labelled, it can influence their self-identity and the way others treat them. Over time, people maybegin to internalise those labels, whether consciously or unconsciously. They slowly start behaving in ways that match the identity that`s been imposed on them.

If you constantly call a child a `troublemaker`, he`ll start believing it, `Maybe I am the one who causes problems... maybe I do mess things up.

Even when he`s not doing anything wrong, that label stays there in his head, shrinking his confidence and making him live up to something he never chose in the first place.

Identity crisis! `You have a habit of doing this` or `Tumhari aa-dat hai!`, a common phrase we hear (and say) far too often, yet it carries a heavy undertone. It`s not just pointing out a habit;it`s a way of judging someone and thinking like that`s how they`ll always be. It`s just like saying, `This is who you are, and you`re not going to change.

Whether it`s said in irritation or just a casual comment, it stamps someone`s behaviour as their identity and shuts the door to growth, making one feel like change isn`t even an option anymore.

This is how drastically labels work. They don`tjust describe, they define. And often, they limit one`s progress. What begins as a passing remark can settle into someone`s identity and become a burden they carry with them, sometimes for years.

When labels hurt We don`t always realise it, but labels do hurt. If someonekeepshearing,`You`re so thin,like ahanger with clothes on!`, `psycho`, `attention-seeker! , `moody,` or `careless` it starts to sting inside.

Even if they don`t show it, they might begin to feel ashamed, confused and self-conscious.

Breaking relationships Because labels make people feel left out like they`re not part of the group. It creates a gap between`us`and`them`. For instance,in a class,when someone is always called `the weird kid` or `the troublemaker,` others might stop including them in conversations. Thus the label created a wall, a distance in the relationship.Take an example from your life, perhaps you were the one labelling your class fellow as a `weird` fellow. What happens is that, over time, your class fellow starts to notice how you and others treat him differently. Maybe he stops talking much in class or hesitate before joining any group activity. You may not have meant to hurt him, but your words might have made him feel like he doesn`t belong.

And even worse is when your label makes others think the same about that poor child.

Now imagine how it would feel if someone called you weird, just for something they thought was strange about you. Not so nice, right? That`s how labels change lives.

Why do we label people? Like many things in life, labels often don`t come from solid logic or deep thinking. They usually grow out of habits, assumptions or what we`ve seen around us. Sometimes they come from social stereotypes, the fixed ideas we`ve been fed about gender, race, culture, religion or class. Other times, they come from personal experiences, such as judging someone based on one moment and thinking that`s how they always are.

And yes, honestly, it`s very easy to call someone `tinka,``mottu,``weirdo,``dumb,``blind,``careless,` etc. because it helps our brains put people in categories. And it`s always easy to have a good laugh at someone else`s expense.

Breaking free from labels First, understand that no one label defines you or the other person. Then watch out for the words you use for them and also those being used for you.

Just stop the words that come out of your mouth as a habit.0bserve, not judge. Even if it`s your own sibling, pause for a second before blurting out, `Hey, lazy couch potato!` Say something kind, like, `You seem low on energy today, is everything okay?` And if your friend has a more rounded physique, instead of casually saying, `Hello motti!` ask yourself: does she likes being called `motti`? What if the word hurts her more? Perhaps all she needs is support, not a label that makes her feel embarrassed or ashamed. Kindness doesn`t cost anything. But labelling costs someone their self-worth.

Even positive labels can be heavy! Although`the smart one,``the strong one,` or `the obedient one,` sound nice, yet they carry a load, an invisible pressure to be what you are known for. Such as a child who is called `the smart one`, shouldn`t feel pressured to always have the answers. The `leader` should know it`s okay to ask for help. And the `obedient daughter` should know that it`s okay if she says,`no` sometimes.

Labels can become invisible cages, even if pretty ones. They should be reminders of potential, not definitions of worth.

Spreading positivity through labels! Not all labelling is bad. For instance, word like `survivor,` `tough one,` `creative,` or `leader` empower and help people recognise their strengths, feel seen and build confidence.

But the key lies in how we use these labels. They should never become boundaries that trap someone inside, but rather doors that open toward deeper understanding and growth.

So next time you`re about to call someone `Drama queen,` `slowpoke,` `psycho,` or `attention-seeker,` stop right there! See the soul. See the person. Not the one word you were going to call them with.

Unlabel others. And maybe this way, you unlabel yourself, too.•