IN our class conscious and money-oriented society, young men are often subjected to an unfair system of evaluation for marriage. Rather than being appreciated for their character, ambition or sincerity, they are assessed based on their income, family wealth and job designation.

This is particularly distressing for men under the age of 30 who are still navigating the difficult early stages of their professional lives. Marriage proposals frequently result in rejection, not due to any personal failing, but simply because these individuals have not yet achieved a financially secure position.

This societalpressure disregardsthe economic realities of the country. The average starting salary for a university graduate in Pakistan is approximately Rs40,000. Youth unemployment remains a pressing issue, and many qualified individuals struggle to secure positions due to widespread corruption and favouritism. The prevailing system has marginalised many capable young men who, despite their qualifications and potential, are denied opportunities. In such a climate, demanding immediate financial stability from every young man is unreasonable and unfair.

This mindset extends beyond arranged marriages and has begun to affect even personal relationships. At universities and colleges, young couples, who once envisioned a shared future, often watch their dreams dissipate when the boy fails to secure a high-paying job or pass some competitive examination.

Instead of being supported during this difficult phase, he is generally compared to others who have succeeded. Ironically, many women, despite being unemployed or financially dependent themselves, choose to reject sincere and devoted men in favour of individuals who offer financial stability, have a prestigious job title, or at least a certain level of family wealth.

As such, this cultural shift echoes the concerns raised by American sociologist Arlie Russell Hochschild, who warned of the `commodification of intimacy`, arguing that human relationships are being increasingly measured by economic worth.Similarly, the sociological concept of `social capital` introduced by Pierre Bourdieu becomes relevant. In South Asian societies, marriages tend to function less as personal unions and more as strategic arrangements designed to preserve or elevate socialstanding.

Adding to this concern is the growing obsession with outward appearances.

Families now place greater importance on superficial display of wealth, such as branded clothing, expensive mobile phones, and luxury vehicles, regardless of whether such possessions are genuine or acquired through debt.

This has created a silent crisis among young men. They are not only heartbroken, but also feel humiliated and unworthy. Their struggles are no longer personal; they are transformed into public narratives offailure.

This societal attitude undermines the self-worth of individuals who are actually doing their best within a system that is already stacked against them. Success is not always immediate, and it is mostly preceded by failure, perseverance and years of hard work. It is time for society to shiftits perspective.

Genuine relationships are not built on wealth, but on the basis of mutual respect, shared goals and the strength to navigate together through life`s many challenges.

Naimatullah Gadhi Khairpur Mirs